I used to be that girl with the curly hair in the back of the classroom... Remember? The baggy jeans, denim jacket, real quiet. I used to want to be just like everyone else. So I became that way.
It didn't take long to figure out how to fit in. You buy a good straightener, more makeup, & name brand clothes advertising the brand right on the front of the ugly pink t-shirt & you get a lot more attention. That was junior high anyway.
Still, my freshman year of high school I was quiet & kind of stuck in the ways of other people. People I wanted to badly to be like. Not because I wanted to be them, but because I wanted people to know me. I wanted to grab the attention of everyone in the school like some of the other people did. Although some of them not in a good way..
It wasn't until my senior year I finally broke free from.. myself. I stopped dressing like everyone else & dressed for me. I wore the clothes I felt most comfortable in, regardless of whether it was the style or not, it was me. I took classes I wanted to take, & not the ones all my friends were a part of (although that is hard to avoid in such a small school anyway). I talked more, louder, raised my hand in class every once in a while, & I met some really great people this way. I joined a school club you might consider nerdy, but it was just for me. I met a lot of great people, & stopped caring so much about what people said about me. I knew who I was, & so did the people who really knew me. I know who I am, & so do the people who really know me.
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| Bein' silly on our trip this summer |
I might not be anyone's idea of perfect. I'm not even my idea of perfect. Then again, what is perfect?
I love things with fur on them, I love leather and peacock feathers, tea, granola bars, laughing, being crazy, singing at the top of my lungs, dark chocolate, talking for hours, yoga, getting ready (which can take me forever)..
I'm a dreamer. I'm always thinking about the future & sometimes I just forget to live right now.
Today I am the best I have ever been, but I am not yet the best I will ever be.
I have become most comfortable with myself. I notice that I don't compare myself to people like I used to. I realized that if I don't like something the way it is, I am the only one who can change that. I have made goals, dreams, ideas, and they are all mine. You wonder why I love Katy Perry so much?
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| As Katy Perry for Halloween 2011 (; |
Honestly (see her movie), she makes me and so many other people want to be like her. Not just because she has achieved it all. She is just so, herself. Despite what everyone's expectations were, she developed into her own person. She makes me want to be like her, in a way that makes me want to be more like me.
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| Kaitlyn |
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| Christian, Juan, Ashley |
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| Megan, Alyssa |
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| Braskin |
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| Katie, Rachel, Cierra, Debbie |
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| Marcus |
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Riley
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| Family |
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| Missing Jacob |
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| Katie |
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| Lexie & Paige |
I have developed a personality that is somewhat sassy, I don't hold myself back like I used to. I don't do things that don't make me happy. I have made some of the best friends I have ever had, & hope I will always have. I am best friends with my boyfriend, my mom, dad, & siblings. I try to share so much love, & love so deeply. I love all the wonderful people in my life.
Sorry, I do not have a million pictures of all of you my friends!
There are so many great things I have realized about myself in all my experiences, I hope you can find those things about yourself. I feel more confident than ever in all my imperfections.
